Throwback 1979: When I was a child I caught a fleeting glimpse out the corner of my eye…of aliens and spacecrafts too and had a gang of neighborhood friends that liked to ride bikes and sneak out for some innocent summer fun. Maybe that is why I felt nostalgic for the first half-hour of Super 8, as Spielberg protege J.J. Abrams revisits early 80’s coming of age boy adventure tales in small town suburbs. But like all Bad Robot productions it soon gets lost and loses steam with the loudest train wreck relegating into a campy Them! But what’s more unbelievable than flying water towers is the unbreakable Scientist warning them kids.
Bad Robot also had the bright idea with their marketing and promotion in releasing vague trailers, stupid puzzles, and going so far as to sending out secret packages to industry assholes with an actual super 8 reel. It’s too bad I didn’t get one because after seeing this movie I would’ve returned that Kodak box with a turd inside.
Besides the beautiful Vilmos Zigmond-like cinematography the only other reason for watching this movie is if your a fan of the My Sharona song. And like The Knack, J.J.’s one hit wonder might just be Star Trek because Mission Impossible is hopeless. But I hope he rebounds with the Star Trek sequel since when using his own material falls short.
On a Thursday opening night at the IMAX who’d of thought there would be so many slackers like me with nothing better to do than stand on line two hours before showtime? Or should I say, Trekkies and Geeks with B.O.
I must admit I wanted one of them Vulcan hands too and was sorry to see no one with Klingon ears, but for once, not sorry to see the movie! Though there is nothing original about this version of Trek, it somehow bridges the gap from fans of the Original Series thereby nullifying nerds of the New Generation‘s Deep Space Nine as well as renewing the Trek franchise. But what’s scary about where this ship is heading is, J. J. Abrams, who is at the helm. While I do give him props for the casting of the crew, especially my fave Simon Pegg as Scottie and an uncanny Spock, who like from the original series, was the heart and soul.
(and yes, that’s his real nose.)
But what’s disconcerting this time around is that he may have too much heart as the man who wrote Regarding Henry, turns Spock into a pussy whipped softy. Don’t get me wrong, but I preferred the latent homo relationship between Spock and Kirk rather than Spock and some chippie Communication Officer. I may be bitter but even Nerds who’ve never scored tail must find the notion of Spock getting some disturbing – for it is his cold caculated personality and not his Alpha Galactic quadrant that we find so charming and relate to. Still, at least Trekkies can fall back on the ultimate geek fantasy of saving the earth from impending doom, time travel, and shagging a green girl. But if you think Spock’s mojo hits a sour note, wait til you get a load of these phasers! Talk about cracker jack water pistols. Forget about trying to set them on stun. I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. Now that’s sticking to the original.
Besides phasers, the only other major flaw is the hour long wait to introduce Simon Pegg (who successfully bounces back from Run, Fat Boy, Run) as the only real comic relief. But the Star Trek movie remains credible with Leonard Nimoy, reprising his iconic role by keeping it real compared to the spokesman for Priceline.com piece of Shat, Kirk.
So I must admit defeat of yet another Hollywood pop culture blockbuster that leaves me wanting and waiting for more. Touche J. J. Abrams, perhaps you are a bonafide geek and not just a some nepotistic untalented Barrymore.